Monday, July 10, 2006

Paying Protection Money To The Gangsta's

This past Friday I finally got everything together and went down to the local gangsta hideout and paid them my protection money. You see, I give them money and they promise not to kill me and my family should they catch me out and about my business on their turf while I'm packing. They hate the idea that I might decide to defend myself from a rival gang or something. So, I pay them off in the hope that they don't murder me for exercising my right to self defence.

Make no bones about it, folks...these are some bad dudes. They are, by their own admission the largest gang in the nation. They have their gang signs on their rides, even on the ones their wives drive...so there's no accidents, right? They wear their dark, intimidating colours and are always making damned sure you know they're gonna cap you or beat you if you mess with them. Frightening people and there 796,000+ of them with more joining every day. It's their world out there, apparently.

And, hopefully they will keep their word and not kill me for carrying. That's the only reason I bother to bribe them anyway, just so they won't shoot me to death or kidnap me and imprison me for exercising my right to defend myself and my family. Shoot, I don't fear their rival gangs more than is prudent. I do fear them, tho because they tend to shoot first and ask questions later.

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